


The Things Inside

by beren



Category: Tokio Hotel
Genre: M/M, Mythical Beings & Creatures
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-06-10
Updated: 2010-06-10
Packaged: 2017-10-10 01:04:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/93536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beren/pseuds/beren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bill is having problems ignoring what he has always felt for Tom.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Things Inside

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Soph for the beta.

  
  
  
  
  
**Entry tags:**   
|   
[category: slash](http://beren-writes.livejournal.com/tag/category:%20slash), [fandom: tokio hotel](http://beren-writes.livejournal.com/tag/fandom:%20tokio%20hotel), [ficfest: mmom](http://beren-writes.livejournal.com/tag/ficfest:%20mmom), [fictype: short fic](http://beren-writes.livejournal.com/tag/fictype:%20short%20fic), [genre: creature fic](http://beren-writes.livejournal.com/tag/genre:%20creature%20fic), [pairing: th - bill/tom](http://beren-writes.livejournal.com/tag/pairing:%20th%20-%20bill/tom), [rating: r to nc17](http://beren-writes.livejournal.com/tag/rating:%20r%20to%20nc17), [type: fiction](http://beren-writes.livejournal.com/tag/type:%20fiction)  
  
---|---  
  


**Merry Month of Masturbation – Day 29**  
[My MMOM Master List 2010](http://beren-writes.livejournal.com/594488.html)  


Bill was feeling really weird. It had started the previous evening at the industry party they had been to and hadn't let up since; so much so that he was beginning to wonder if someone had spiked his drink. The ridiculous Viagra story about Tom came to mind, because Bill's problem was an almost permanent hard on. It did come and go, so he was pretty sure it wasn't drug related, but he just didn't seem to be able to shift it for long no matter how many times he dealt with it using his hand.

What made it really weird was the fact that, honestly, he wasn't an overly sexual being. He could do sexy and he knew what he found attractive, but Tom was the one who was interested in actual sex, not him. He had been for a while as a teenager, but then he had realised who he was actually interested in and he had put the brakes on that whole side of his personality. It had been a perfectly conscious decision and he played at being normal and having had sex, but he wasn't and he hadn't.

The fact was he had come to terms with the idea he wanted Tom and no one else and had simply decided to deal with it. He had explained it all to Tom, along with his solution, and Tom helped him cover up the fact that he barely looked at girls. He was even playing the fake girlfriend game at the moment for the management. The hugs and cuddles he got from Tom were enough for him, except that suddenly they didn't seem to be.

"Tomi," he said, sticking his head round Tom's door.

His twin looked up and smiled from where he was sitting on his bed and plucking out a tune on his acoustic guitar.

"Hey," Tom replied and immediately moved up so that there was room on the side of the bed for Bill to sit down as well; "I think I have a tune for that new song you've been writing."

That made Bill smile a little as he walked in and took up the created spot next to Tom, but it didn't help much with his problem.

"Great," he said, trying to sound enthusiastic.

The way Tom looked at him he knew he had failed.

"What's up?" Tom asked almost instantly and put his guitar aside.

"Something's strange, Tomi," he replied quietly, not really sure how to start; "I don't feel right."

Tom's face crinkled up with concern straight away and he moved closer.

"What's wrong," was the worried question, "are you ill?"

Bill shook his head; he was beginning to feel a little silly.

"It's," he said and stopped.

He could tell Tom anything, he knew that, even 'I pulled all the strings off your Gibson to use as accessories' wouldn't cause a rift for long, but this was awkward.

"You know the whole Viagra thing?" he tried again.

Tom nodded of course.

"I think something like that might have happened to me," he said, biting his lip. "I keep ... um ... getting hard ... and even though ... um ... I deal with it ... well ... it keeps coming back."

Tom did not laugh at him, which he had been pretty sure would have been the case, but there had been just a niggling doubt.

"How long?" Tom asked in a very straight forward manner.

"Since last night," Bill said, chewing his lip rather thoroughly.

"Did you drink or eat anything you shouldn't have?" was the next very sensible question.

Bill shook his head again; he'd barely touched anything. The champagne had been handed to him by security, so no one could have tampered with it, and he'd eaten one celery stick; they'd had dinner before going to the party.

"And it goes away, but keeps coming back?" Tom asked to be sure.

"Yeah," he replied, blushing.

He was getting hard again right at that moment and he'd only just come from the bathroom where he had jerked off.

"Does it just happen or are you thinking about sex as well?" Tom asked and it seemed Tom was trying to be very delicate with him; highly unusual.

"That's what's causing it," Bill admitted, feeling thoroughly ashamed of himself; "I can't get sex out of my head."

They both knew when Bill said sex, what he really meant was Tom and sex.

"Oh," was Tom's not particularly helpful response.

"I didn't get any sleep last night," Bill admitted quietly.

His brain had just refused to shut down; it was driving him crazy.

"None at all?" Tom asked, sounding surprised.

Bill shook his head.

"I shut my eyes and, well, there you are," he said apologetically.

The fantasies he was having about Tom were becoming more and more outrageous; he didn't really know how to deal with it.

"Well," Tom said, regarding him thoughtfully, "what could have happened last night that caused this?"

Bill shrugged; he had gone over and over things in his head and nothing jumped out.

"There was one guy at the party," Bill said, trying to find something; "he kept making passes as me, but when I asked security to get rid of him he just vanished and he didn't get that close to me."

Men making passes at him was not new, so he didn't think that was really it, but it was all he had.

"Did he touch you, get anywhere near your drink?" Tom asked, but all Bill could do was shake his head; there had been nothing like that. "Maybe you just need to get it out of your system."

Tom suggested with a little gesture of helplessness.

"Bill, people throw themselves at you all the time, you're twenty years old and you're a virgin," Tom said and patted him on the leg; "maybe you just need to deal with the whole sex thing."

"I am not going out and sleeping with someone just because," Bill said and crossed his arm; "you know how I feel about that."

If there was one thing Bill was sure of, it was that he was not giving up his virginity on a whim to someone he did not love. Tom looked a little defeated at how adamant he was.

"Then maybe you need to get me out of your system," Tom said after a few moment's awkward silence.

Bill frowned; he didn't know what Tom was trying to say, which was unusual.

"How?" he asked, not enjoying being horny and confused at the same time.

Tom looked very unsure, but finally sighed.

"Okay, I know we talked about all this before," Tom said, looking down at his hands, "and because of out there we decided not to try, but what if you need it to get over it?"

Bill frowned some more; now he knew what Tom was suggesting.

"You think we should have sex?" he asked, a little incredulously.

There were so many reasons that was a bad idea, one of which was that Bill was pretty sure that once he'd had what he wanted he would never ever want to give it up.

"Maybe not full on sex," Tom said hastily, "but, maybe if I ... um ... touched you ... it would help you move on?"

Tom was blushing furiously and in that moment Bill realised how much it had cost Tom to offer that and he was once again amazed at what his twin was willing to do for him. On impulse he threw his arms around Tom. He eventually sat back when he had finally decided how to reply.

"Do you think it might work?" he asked, very unsure, but willing to accept Tom's judgement.

Tom gave a little shrug.

"It might," Tom replied, sounding just as awkward as Bill felt.

Bill had refused to consider crossing the line before, but he really couldn't think about anything else and it was the only possible solution on the table. A little excited feeling started in the bottom of his stomach at the idea.

"So, how do we find out?" he asked, feeling more nervous than he had done about anything since they had first stepped on stage.

He felt so out of his depth and he was incredibly glad when he saw Tom's expression change; it meant Tom was taking over.

"Come on," Tom said, taking the guitar from the bed and put it on the floor, moving up against the headboard and opening his arms.

It was a familiar thing; Bill enjoyed being cuddled and Tom often indulged him, but there was an added undercurrent as he moved into Tom's arms and snuggled down just a little.

"What should I do?" Bill asked, feeling nervous.

"Just relax and stop worrying," Tom replied and rubbed his shoulder gently, "leave it to me."

Bill looked up into Tom's face then and he looked into his twin's dark eyes and felt perfect trust; Tom would look after him.

For a while Tom just held him and he began to relax despite the images going through his head. Having Tom that close did not help him in any way with suppressing what he was feeling and he could feel his need tingling through his body. He decided to close his eyes and, when Tom finally started to move, he kept them closed, not wanting to see any hesitation that might be in Tom's expression. Tom's touch was gentle and just ghosted over his stomach, lulling him a little until it moved down and he gasped as Tom's hand touched him ever so lightly though his jeans. It was like electricity running through him as Tom's fingers only barely alighted on his body; it didn't matter that he was still wearing his clothes.

"It's okay," Tom told him quietly, "just do whatever you want to."

What Bill wanted to do was beg for more and for it to never end, but what he did was moan gently as Tom carefully increased the pressure.

"More," he finally breathed, still not opening his eyes.

Tom's quick fingers popped the button on his jeans almost immediately and the zip was no match, allowing Tom's hand to slide under the tight material. His whole body lit up with pleasure and he squeezed his eyes more tightly shut so that he could just feel. Tom pulled him free of his clothes, caressing him gently but firmly and Bill whimpered at the wonderful feelings. He had never imagined it quite like this and he felt his whole being absorbing the experience, taking every moment deep down inside so he would never forget it.

He wanted Tom, always had, and he felt it with every cell in his body as Tom stroked him and brought him step by step closer to the burning pleasure he knew was coming. It was not like when he had touched himself; this felt entirely different and he knew that this explosion was not going to be a little one. Tom's touch was the most perfect caress, like his body was made to feel it, and he chased the goal under Tom's careful ministrations.

So many feelings came with the physical sensations, but he pushed them away, refused to acknowledge them for now. All he needed was Tom's touch and he let himself surrender to it completely and reached for everything it could give him.

Arching up, Bill came and he finally opened his eyes and found himself looking directly into Tom's. He couldn't breathe as he stared into their dark depths and his body shuddered beyond his control as his orgasm ripped through him. What he wanted to say was 'I love you, please never let me go', but all he did was gasp and cling to Tom as his physical form reached the height and then slowly came down.

Part of him felt shame, but the majority of his mind could not condemn himself for feeling what was in his heart. He buried his head in Tom's shoulder and tried to bury the guilt as well.

For a while Tom just held him and they lay there, saying nothing, just breathing. For a while Bill thought it might even have worked; his mind was quiet and blank, but slowly it began to move again. When he realised where his thoughts were going, he threw himself away from Tom.

"No!" he screamed, putting his hands to his temples. "Get out of my head."

The thoughts were piling back in, all the ways he wanted Tom, all the wrong things he was thinking. He just couldn't get rid of them and now they seemed even worse. Slamming into the window, he came to a stop, not caring what he must look like to anyone outside. He was going mad and there was nothing he could do about it.

"Bill," Tom said worriedly from behind him, but he didn't dare turn.

He stared out into the world, not really seeing anything until his eyes caught something that made him look properly. There, standing by the edge of the property was the man from the party; the one who had seemed to want him so badly and, looking up at him, the man smiled. Bill felt all the energy flow out of him as he stared into the man's eyes and with them all the thoughts barrelling through his head. It was as if he was being sucked dry and then the man saluted him, turned and seemed to fade away, almost as if he had never been.

All Bill could do was stare and, as the man finally vanished, his eyes rolled back into his head and he just about realised that Tom caught him as he passed out.

When he woke up, he was in his own bed with Tom sitting next to him above the covers, reading a magazine.

"Tom?" he said, blinking up at his brother and wondering what the hell had happened.

He was dressed in his t-shirt and boxers, but everything else was gone and there was a sticking plaster on the inside of his left arm that he didn't remember from before.

"Bill," Tom said, instantly putting down what he was reading and looking him over very carefully, "how are you feeling?"

Bill considered that for a while.

"Fine," he said eventually, "but still sleepy."

"Yeah," Tom said as if he had been expecting that, "the doctor said you might. You're on complete bed rest for at least two days and no arguments. You're suffering from exhaustion."

That was a little confusing, because he had been perfectly alright earlier.

"I was okay this morning," he protested and tried to sit up, so Tom immediately moved to help him.

"That was yesterday morning," Tom said and he almost fell out of bed in shock; "you've been asleep nearly twenty hours; you passed out yesterday afternoon."

Bill didn't know what to say about that and then he remembered what he had seen out the window.

"It was the man from the party," he said as it all came flooding back; "he was outside. Tomi, I don't think he was a man."

That put a worried frown on Tom's face, but Bill needed his twin to believe him.

"Tom," he said, holding on to his brother's arms; "he was there, I swear he was. Everything seemed to rush out of me, all the thoughts and all the energy and then he vanished."

Tom did not look like he thought that was true.

"It was just a dream, Bill," Tom told him gently, pulling back the cover and climbing in beside him before he could object; "you've been over working."

It felt a little strange when Tom pulled him into his arms and made him lie down against him, but it still felt just as comforting.

"Now you need to rest," Tom told him in a very firm tone. "Everything is cancelled for the next few days and all you have to do is worry about eating and sleeping, okay?"

Bill wanted to protest, but he did still feel tired.

"Okay," he said, although reluctantly; he knew what he had seen.

"And when you're feeling better, we're having a very long talk," Tom added, which made Bill sit up again so he could see his twin.

"About what?" he asked, feeling just a little annoyed about Tom trying to run his life.

"About us," Tom said and pulled him back down, "and about how touching what you can't have makes it harder to resist."

For a moment Bill just processed that.

"Tomi," he said eventually, "do you mean ..?"

"Later," was all Tom said, not allowing him to finish; "rest now."

Bill wanted to argue, he really did, but Tom was gently stroking the back of his neck and it was so very lovely that Bill finally gave in.

"Okay," he said quietly, "later," and let Tom take care of him.

**The End**


End file.
